Beyond Your Eyes
by Scath Rocco Meoi
Summary: Natsuki realizes Shizuru's a lot more important than she thought at first, but will there still be time to correct past mistakes? NatsukiXShizuru Shoujo-ai One-shot


**AUTHOR'S NOTES: **Hello, Scath here. This is my Valentine's Day fic of the year. Actually I wrote it last year, in Portuguese, for Valentine's Day here in Brazil (June 12), and now I'm translating it and bringing it to you. Hope you'll like it.

_Beyond Your Eyes_

She arrived late at school, which was natural, ran through the yard, bought a sandwich in the lunchroom and made a quick stop at the bathroom before running to the classroom, until there nothing unusual, all this running was part of her routine, but there was something missing, it was as if she had forgotten something, and so she made the way back.

The door of the Students' Council Room was open and a strong wind entered through the window, but what caught her attention was the desk, empty, Shizuru wasn't there, she wasn't there to say 'good morning' with that contagious smile like every morning.

The bell rang but she didn't move, suddenly, everything seemed to have lost its meaning, her routine, the extra activities, everything seemed to be strangely empty.

"Shouldn't you be in the classroom, Kuga?" the executive director of the council, Suzushiro Haruka, approached with her authoritative air.

"I... I need to talk with Shizuru." It was the only reasonable answer she could give.

"She isn't coming today, you may not have noticed, but I think she's sick."

"Sick?" Natsuki was surprised, it really had been a long time since she had last talked to Shizuru, but by the tone of her 'good mornings' she had judged everything was well.

"Yeah, lately she had been quieter than usual and she practically didn't eat nor drink what is very weird for that _Bubuzuke-onna¹_."

"You think I can find her in the dorms?"

"I think so, but n—. Come back here!" the executive director shouted while watching the dark haired girl run away. "It's my duty to make sure you attend your classes!"

* * *

Natsuki arrived in the dormitory to discover that Shizuru had left at the usual hour, therefore, there was only one place where she could've gone, and it was in that very same house that the dark haired girl found her.

She was sitting in the balcony, her gaze lost in the horizon, thoughtful but also sad, there was an extremely melancholic air about the whole place, that old house must have witnessed a lot more than climate changes during those long years.

"Shizuru?" she approached slowly.

"Natsuki?!" unable to hide her surprise, the older girl stood up brushing away a tear discreetly and rearranging her traditional smile. "I didn't expect to see you here but it's a great surprise! Would you like a cup of tea?"

"Shizuru…"

"Sit down. I'll be right back." The blonde entered the house with as much calmness as she could gather and closed the door behind her, she felt a strong pain in her chest and the anguish obstructing her throat made the simple act of breathing a real challenge, the last person she wanted to see was Natsuki, she was still fighting against her heart, trying to erase the love she felt for the girl who would never love her.

She pressed her chest, the pain persisted, but there was nothing that anybody, least of all her, could do. The only choice that remained was going to the kitchen and preparing the tea.

* * *

Natsuki stared restlessly at the scenery, even though Shizuru had tried to hide, she had noticed, the absent air, the tears, she had never seen the other girl so depressed, not even when they had fought each other a few months before, and she didn't like to see the blonde so sad, it was heartbreaking, it was as if… As if Natsuki was sad herself, and that realization made her feel even more worried.

She sighed and turned her attention to two birds that flew around each other, maybe that was the problem, but was it really? Or was it the solution? One way or another she knew something had to be done.

"Sorry it took me so long." Shizuru kneeled and placed the tray between them on the floor. "Here."

"Thanks."

"Do you need anything else?"

"Oh! Me? No, no. I only found it strange that you didn't go to class… Haruka said you were sick and I thought it would be nice to check if you needed anything."

"Really? That's so sweet, Natsuki!"

"Yeah, maybe…" the dark haired girl muttered a few other things while trying to hide her blush.

"But you didn't need to miss classes because of me… You could've come later."

"Yeah, I… It was a good excuse to and I needed a free day."

"Ah… I should've known, after all I'm taking the day off too." Shizuru took a sip of her tea to disguise her disappointment at the other's words, but, again, what else could she do besides trying to convince herself that there wasn't any chance of a relationship between them?

"So you're not sick?"

"Sick? Natsuki, have you ever seen me sick?"

"Well, no, but…"

"That answers my question. How's the tea?"

"Great." She answered with precision despite not having tasted it, that strange and uncomfortable situation had distracted her enough for her to forget the cup between her hands. "Shizuru…"

"Yes?"

"I don't like to bring up the subject, but…"

"But?" the blonde could barely contain herself, there was no hope but still her heart beat so fast she was sure the other could hear it.

"There is smoothing wrong and we need to talk about it."

"Something wrong?" she felt her heart stop, was that the end? She couldn't live without at least having the friendship of the dark haired girl.

"Seriously wrong, and I may not have noticed before, but I feel like it's my responsibility to help you."

"Natsuki… What are you talking about?"

"You were almost crying when I arrived and Haruka said you haven't been eating normally, don't try to deny it, just tell me, what can I do?"

'_Love me.' _The thought crossed her mind, but she could never say it, it would've been too selfish, so she simply put on the smile she always wore and asked innocently. "Natsuki, are you okay?"

"Shizuru, now it's not about me!" Natsuki stood up in a desperate impulse, the tea cup rolling on the floor and spilling its contents. "It's about you! And I can see far beyond your eyes, I've known you for years! I know that there's something wrong."

At that moment, those words were more than she could take and Shizuru felt hot tears running down her face, suddenly, the realization of all the things they had gone through, of the suffering that weighted on her day after day eroding her soul, she covered her mouth with her hand to stop the sobs.

"Shizuru… Listen, you can cry, that won't change the way I see you." The dark haired girl kneeled again taking care with the puddle her tea had formed. "We're all human… We have the right to be sad. You included."

"Natsuki, I… You… Please, forgive me!"

"There is nothing to forgive, Shizuru." Natsuki didn't know where all those gentle words were coming from, not even that tender, protective feeling invading her, but she decided to use them in her favor.

"There is, there is a lot… I should've never fallen in love with you and least of all told you, I only disrupted you, making you feel guilty and worry about me." The blonde managed to say between sobs that shook her whole body.

"_Baka²! _Worry about yourself a little, can't you see how much you're suffering? Whatever bad you think you've done you are certainly already paying for it and more than you should."

"But, Natsuki—."

"Shizuru, I'm the one who should apologize…" green eyes met wine colored ones and, for one moment, they were frozen, just staring at one another. "I made a mistake and I only realized that today."

"You did?"

"I did." They couldn't look away and since Shizuru wasn't saying anything, the dark haired girl continued. "When I was almost in front of my classroom, I realized that there was something missing, I made the way back and found the Students' Council Room empty, you weren't there to say 'good morning' and that's what was missing, but it was impressive how something so common could create such emptiness… That was when I understood, Shizuru, that you are my reason to go on, the light that brightens my day, the most important person… The one I love."

Shizuru was paralyzed, had she heard right? She had to be dreaming, yeah, that was it, a dream, soon she would wake up and everything would disappear, she needed to say something, anything before the end, but the reality of that dream had taken her voice, had stolen every word she had left.

"I will understand if you don't want me anymore, after all I refused you once, but I still wanted you to kn—."

She couldn't finish because the arms of the blonde had enlaced her neck and her soft lips were pressed against her own, so familiar, like they had been made especially for one another, she fought against the need to breath, she wanted that moment to last forever, but she had to interrupt that so strongly desired intimacy after some time.

"Natsuki, you're telling the truth, right?"

"Would I lie to you?"

"Tell me this isn't a dream."

"No, it's not a dream, Shizuru." The dark haired girl smiled. "I'm here."

"I love you so much…" Shizuru caressed the other girl's cheek.

"Come on, let's go inside." Natsuki grabbed the hand the blonde had left on her face and stood up.

"Are you sure about that?" Shizuru felt obliged to ask as she stood.

"Absolutely."

"Then…" the blonde approached, lips touching the dark haired girl's ear lightly. "What are we waiting for?" Natsuki smiled, despite the shiver that ran down her spine, it was good to have the old Shizuru back.

¹ Woman of the tea with rice.

² Idiot.


End file.
